How To KILL Your Fear (in 7 minutes)


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failure might delay your dreams but fear will kill them because fear leads to in action so in today’s video you’ll learn seven tricks to help silence that voice in your head that fears rejection that way you can go into any conversation with confidence knowing you’ll feel completely unfaced if you do get rejected well I don’t think we should see each other anymore oh that’s okay what no it’s fine no problem I’ll meet somebody else the first step to becoming Fearless in conversation is realizing that you are not your first impression when you think I got rejected it makes you feel like you aren’t good enough that’s why you’re scared of rejection so replace the thought I got rejected with something more accurate and more empowering like that conversation didn’t go well because someone can’t possibly reject you they can’t see your soul they don’t know you to your core someone can only reject how you’ve presented yourself and how you present yourself is a skill you can improve as you get more gain more experience auditioning you get better at it and you start really to get feedback the same idea applies to interviews sales dating apps and approaching someone attractive they’re all skills you can learn to be incredibly good at any of them so anytime you get rejected simply think of it as feedback that there’s a skill you need to improve the second trick to stop fearing rejection is to realize that rejection is inevitable shame is optional everyone gets rejected and often the most successful people in the world have failed more and been rejected more than anyone else the auditioning process is basically a process of being rejected over and over and over and over and over again until you either give up or something breaks and you get you get an opportunity when I raised money for Amazon 40 people told me no so I had to take 60 meetings to get 20 yeses she asked me to be her prom date and then the day before she told me she was only joking and she went with Sebastian lipat instead the next time you’re feeling Shame about being rejected remind yourself that everyone you admire has been rejected at some point rejection doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you internalize that and you’ll stop fearing it not only is it normal rejection often paves the road to to success it doesn’t matter whether your goal is to find an amazing person to date get your dream job or start a successful business exceptional results often require multiple tries so instead of avoiding rejection recognize that life is a numbers game maximize your shots on goal do you know how many auditions the average working actor needs to go on typically before booking a job one in 64 auditions and I promised myself I wasn’t going to get upset if I didn’t book some um before 64 auditions because that would be diluted thinking because the reality is is that’s the average here’s the formula to living your dream life try if you fail reflect on why you failed improve try again repeat that process and your success is inevitable if these mindset shifts aren’t enough to get you to take action there’s a more concrete trick you can use amp up your carrot Stick Motivation if you aren’t taking action on something it means the reward you think you’ll get by doing it doesn’t outweigh the pain you imagine you’ll feel if you fail so to get yourself to take action increase the cost of not trying one way is the money method go to a friend you trust give them $20 and tell them you only get it back if you do the thing that scares you if that doesn’t get you to take action simply increase the amount of money eventually you will take action just to get your money back once you do start trying you’ll experience something amazing rejections are good for you repeatedly risking rejection is one of the fastest ways to build extreme confidence it’s exposure therapy you do what scares you over and over until it doesn’t phase you Navy SEAL DAV gagin says this habit is the key to all of his success and that’s the key thing through repetition of things you don’t want to do you develop mental like like an armor for your mind sometimes all it takes is one day of action to permanently level up your confidence for example the guy in this next video has never gone out on a date in his life so he decides that to get over his fear of rejection he’s going to ask out 100 women in one day Watch What Happens no no no realistically no I probably wouldn’t now at this point Point Sam started to lose what little confidence he had coming in but his whole life he’d always heard the phrase eighth times the charm so he decided to give it one more try would you go on a date with me yeah I mean you seem very straightforward yes I like how you approached me my God now hold up hold up hold up she may be laughing it’s not a no h what about somewhere in UCSD would you say yes if I said somewhere in UCSD sure why not told you there is power in speedrunning rejection in a very short period of time you can transform from someone who’s Paralyzed by fear and one of the most courageous people you know just make sure you do this in a way that’s fun and light-hearted don’t be rude or hostile and if you live in a super small town or School consider taking a trip somewhere before you try this just so you don’t build a reputation asking people out isn’t the only way to build your courage muscle you can do cold calling or door to door sales or you can try something like Noah Kagan Starbucks challenge go to a different coffee shop each day and ask for your coffee for free in Jordan Peterson’s clinical experience exercises like these are the fastest way to build courage get over your fear of rejection and how do you do that by encountering it continually and continually and continually so that you’re no longer paralyzed once you’ve done everything in this video enough times you’ll find yourself a changed person you’ll have a ton of confidence and you’ll have grown so much from reflecting on what didn’t go well at that point the meaning of rejection shifts rejection becomes a sign that you aren’t a good match once you’ve worked on yourself and your confidence and you’re happy with who you are it stops being about presentation now rejection is about fit rejection is actually sparing you from a future breakup or a firing this mindset becomes way easier to have if you zoom out if you obsess over getting one specific job or one specific person you get desperate and you’re going to be afraid of rejection instead focus on becoming the type of person who has options so if you get nervous during job interviews focus on building the Charisma skills to interview well and the work rated skills that you know will make you a great applicant then interviews become something you actually look forward to cuz you know you’ll crush them or if dating makes you nervous don’t worry about getting one particular person to like you instead focus on becoming someone that a lot of people would love to be with and even beyond that purposely create a life you really enjoy even when you aren’t dating anyone suddenly you won’t care nearly as much if you get rejected because you don’t feel like you need them in order to be happy life is a lot more fun when you have multiple options you’re happy with the fastest way I know of to build a life with options is to develop your charisma because achieving mastery most skills can take years and even decades but you can see massive Improvement in your charisma in just a month or two most people simply never try to learn it or if they do they aren’t sure how to learn it effectively if you want a specific blueprint for taking your charisma to the next level check out our video course Charisma University it’s a step-by-step program that tells you exactly what to do every day so that 30 days from now you radiate confidence and Charisma naturally without even thinking about it if you want to see if it’s right for you click the link on screen now or in the description below either way I hope this video has helped you and I look forward to seeing you in the next one

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33 Comments

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  1. You, reading this right now, please send me the full speech of Jordan Peterson shown in the video if you have any idea where to find it. Thank you so much

  2. Crap I'm past the 8th rejection πŸ˜‚ and I'm all out of options, I can somewhat carry conversations with girls I meet for the first time in public it's just that usually when I run into them it's quiet all around and there are way too many people looking

  3. That you think petty incel fascists Ben Shapiro or Jordan Peterson are even remotely models for behavior tells us all we need to know about what you think.

  4. But note people that this video specifically focuses on the fear of rejection ''of the first impression''. There are different kinds of rejection that cut deeper like the rejection of a long time relationship, family, close friend. Being rejected by a person you hold in high esteem and love is very different. The appropriate reaction to that is more complicated and different charisma rules are required to handle it and deal with it emotionally. In this case, having options is insufficient because some people are irreplaceable