How To Be Effortlessly Popular

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david dobrik is a popular guy not only with his massive audience but also with very different types of friends including his vlog squad buddies Jason Nash who is 20 years older than him and the one and only John Stamos you John Stamos stupid strong very much so in this video we’re going to break down how you can get some of that insane popularity without being an inauthentic trihard now the most obvious piece of what makes David so appealing to so many people is surprisingly simple he makes you laugh and he does it by laughing and having fun himself and you can see that same principle of laughter making other people enjoy themselves to the extreme in David’s vlogs where there is an uproarious laugh every five to ten seconds not only does laughter encourage other people to join in and enjoy themselves but when you laugh at other people’s jokes you’re essentially complimenting them without words you’re saying hey I think you’re really funny and people feel just as drawn to those who give hearty laughs as those who offer genuine compliments so if you in the back of your mind think that there’s some benefit to having a sophisticated sense of humor that only laughs at the most cleverly structured jokes let that go one particular thing that you might want to stop doing is insulting lowbrow humor it’s fine if you’re not a fan of certain movies or YouTube channels but don’t comment on how dumb they may seem to you otherwise you’re just reinforcing that not laughing is cooler to other people and in your own mind instead allow yourself to laugh at the dumbest lowbrow silly jokes and the more you let yourself go here the better the big open mouth belly laughs are some of the most endearing service here it’s so quick it comes right to your table or shin you don’t need to respond literally to every statement in a conversation for instance and the next clip David is talking to his co-hosts about how he wishes he could be home in the evening to watch the office with his kids and David gravitates towards a humorous interpretation of what he just said like they’re really into the office right now so they sit and watch they are so funny so funny how they’re into the office but they both still call you daddy I love the office mean my daddy watch it now these ideas may sound easier said than done especially if a silly attitude doesn’t come naturally to you in that case you might think that being yourself means being serious all the time but actually you can loosen up your sense of humor while remaining your authentic self the key is in priming or changing your environment so that it puts you in a more fun state prior to interacting with others part of the reason that some people are so serious is because they do this backwards only priming themselves with serious topics at home they watch the news at work they discuss what needs to be done and to relax they maybe read nonfiction so it’s natural that when they interact with the doorman the cashier or even their loved ones they’re very serious and literal of course there’s nothing wrong with being serious but you can become unbalanced if you never make space for some goofiness this is why purposely taking just 5 to 10 minutes to prime yourself with the type of influence that you would like to embody is so important I’ve personally loved watching clips of Chris Pratt because that sense of humor just clicks with me snap last chapter you ain’t seen nothing what’s my snack it’s a carrot cake muffin if you want to see more of how Chris maintains that playful sense of humor you can check that out in our video breakdown of him by clicking the link here or if you want a never-ending supply of jokes and good priming david’s vlogs can be a perfect primer before going out to socialize now the second thing that you’ll notice watching David is that his speaking contains a lot of high-impact words specifically it’s almost always about what he loves but I’m still like in like them to be best I have the best job in the world so I can’t complain but I posted a vine there’s actually a really cool story like I’ll still have talked to my old high school teachers really like yeah it’s their high school knees like I love it I’ll go back and visit that we talked about like it’s really I was always so excited but I was like on cloud nine I literally I was shown in Palm Springs like the most exciting thing even when David seems to have mixed feelings he doesn’t come down neutrally he talks about what he hates and there what he loves at the same time and they’re both great yeah they’re both great and they both suck the choice of these high emotion words might not seem like a big deal but think of the person that you know who is always fine and thinks that things are okay it’s tough to care during your interactions with them and they wind up coming across as having very bland personalities now since you don’t want to be a try-hard the answer here is not to artificially inflate your language with superlatives that you don’t really feel it’s to move conversation in the direction of things you feel strongly about particularly those things that you strongly like so for instance if someone’s asking get-to-know-you questions about where or how you grew up and you’re not really super passionate about those answers transition instead to something that you do care about and you can see Dave and do that here this case towards the negative it seems like the kids always have something more to prove yes do you think that kind of fuels you is that is in your DNA maybe subconsciously that I’ve never thought about that never I was never alike and you know what I hate I like this when I first moved to LA and I would pull up to like people in Lamborghinis and Ferraris and I’d be like what do you do because this is my favorite question to ask someone how do I get the Ferrari yeah and they go and they go work hard and it was stop you answer and here he moves towards the positive first youtuber friend that’s tough I’m gonna change it to first vine her friend Jack Dietrich the guy who works here Jack come here this is Jack he actually helped me with my he works here now I’m genuinely kicked off my career which is insane generally speaking you want to go positive but any emotions going to be better than none now if you’ve been a fan of the channel this point might seem a bit odd to you because in videos with characters like James Bond or Don Draper we talked about how their confidence is conveyed in their lack of emotional displays in their non reactivity like here Yankee are they making fun of me a little bit to clarify the low reactivity that bond and Draper are displaying is in the face of provocation often from an adversary their stillness shows us that they aren’t afraid things will go wrong and that no matter what they will be okay which is the core of confidence but in many social situations knowing that you will be okay looks more like David’s enthusiastic self-expression than it does like bonds icy coolness so even though it might seem different on the surface speaking in enthusiastic superlatives displays that same deep inner confidence that you might see in a James Bond or Don Draper ultimately that person believes everything will be okay and that they can afford to be their goofy selves now a fantastic question that will guide you in the direction of these authentic confident moments is to ask how would I behave in this situation if I wasn’t afraid and in many social scenarios the answer is that you’d be more expressive much like David also if you’re enjoying this video and want to make sure that you don’t miss any of our new ones you should hit the subscribe button and the notification bill now we’re gonna be experimenting with different upload schedule and without the notifications turned on you might miss some of those upcoming videos that I’m planning on people like Hugh Jackman’s Scarlett Johansson and potentially one on the differences between sociopaths and Psychopaths now the next thing that you notice about David is that he’s very comfortable with self-deprecating humor often cracking up at himself as he tells his own embarrassing stories this is so stupid it’s not so bizarre we’ve gone deeper into self deprecation in the past for instance in the video with Chris Evans and Robert Downey jr. but as far as being a try-hard goes self deprecation can be a tricky topic because sometimes it’s used to tease our own insecurities before other people can get to them and in those scenarios it can be alienating to the people around us but self-deprecating jokes aren’t necessarily a good or a bad thing on their own far more important is your mental state surrounding them and the same question as before applies here how would I behave if I wasn’t afraid if you find that you’re avoiding self-deprecating stories because you’re afraid other people might judge you then it can be worth opening up a bit and laughing at some of your goof-ups but of course you want to approach it with the same goal of enjoying those stories as David does even when he’s laughing about how much he disappoints his personal trainer he’s having a blast he made me do push-ups on my knees and I was dude I’m not doing press on my knees on the other hand if you’re only telling self-deprecating stories because you’re afraid someone else will point out one of your insecurities first then you’re better served to relax and not feel so rushed to preempt other people either way the goal is simply to do what makes you have the most fun not what you think will make others respond in the best way now the fourth unmissable thing about David is that he puts the spotlight on other people his friends have become the stars in his vlog while he stayed behind the camera for the most part he’s given a dozen or more people a platform from which to launch the careers and entertainment and he’s taken sponsor revenue to give away more than 15 ridiculously expensive cars now during this rise to fame that definitely meant that David was in the shadow of some of the people that he worked with particularly his ex Liza Koshi it’s funny because there’s been websites that have written articles about me and they’ll be like these are his best videos and I was at the airport today and I kicked walks up to me you look like Liza Koh she’s that’s what he said but despite spending some time in the shadow of others David continued to spread credit to his friends my friends and the things around me my friends my friends are a big inspiration I’m here in New York by myself and I’m crying to my friends that they’re not here and people have noticed for having a YouTube channel it’s a vlog about yourself you’re one of the least narcissistic on camera in real life you’re a total narcissist giving others the spotlight can be easier said than done especially when it means that you receive less attention and maybe you don’t get to keep that car for yourself which takes us to the subtle mindset that underpins everything we’ve talked about in this video and it’s learning to tap into the joy of others without having to become a people pleaser you see people pleasers can do all of the things that David does they can make other people to spotlight give away cars or gifts and tell self-deprecating stories but for the people pleaser this stems from a desire to be liked and accepted by others ultimately because they don’t deeply like and accept themselves and each one of those nice things that they do comes with a hidden expectation of how the other person needs to feel or behave in return on the other hand the person who’s tapping into the joy of others might exhibit all those same behaviors the gift-giving joke-telling laughing heartily at other people’s jokes but for them it’s not done to make other people like more it’s done because witnessing the joy of others participating in that makes them happy in and of itself and they’re able to experience this vicarious joy because they’ve already given themselves the love and acceptance that many seek from outside of themselves I guess my slogan when it comes to money would be always give back I know it sounds cheesy but it goes without saying once you have money you’re you’re gonna want to get back and it’s the best best food now I can’t say for sure what’s going on inside of David’s head but I can tell you that arriving at this point can take a while and the desire for validation rarely disappears completely but you can move more and more in this direction over time for instance by taking on projects that are enjoyable even if they’re never successful with a wider audience or simply by making a habit of looking into the mirror and saying I love you to yourself when you wake up in the morning by taking steps like these and giving yourself love and acceptance you’ll start to increase your inner confidence and then you’ll naturally be able to make people like you respect you and want to be around you without trying too hard or being inauthentic and if you want to fast-track yourself to that deep unshakable confidence I highly recommend you check out our course charisma University Kris muna versity is our step-by-step program that is guaranteed to make you more confident and charismatic in just 30 days over 5,000 people have already joined the program and had amazing results and here’s what just some Cu members have said about the program and its impact on their lives the first one says I wasn’t truly confident I was constantly seeking validation and care too much about other people’s opinions of me but now my life has improved tremendously because of charisma University I find it way easier to connect with people to have great interactions and be happy even if things don’t go the way I want them to taking this course has been one of the most impactful decisions of my life I can’t recommend it enough now this next member writes how charisma University instantly transformed his social life he says thank you guys so much for your work I’ve instantly had results that seemed insane so many more meaningful connections my friendships have improved in my interactions with total strangers are a new exciting and fulfilling thing I want to recommend this to everyone this should be in our basic education system and just one more I love the way that you lay out the charisma styles out of the five I found that the authenticity style really resonated with me I was super honest and authentic during the interview for my current job and I was interviewing my boss as much as she was interviewing me I got the job and my boss Steele mentions my interview and honesty to this day now charisma University also comes with a 60-day money-back guarantee that is 100% for any reason whatsoever that means that there’s no risk on your part either you become more confident charismatic or you can get every single penny back so to find out more about charisma University click the link on your screen below or the link in the description either way I hope that you’ve enjoyed today’s video and I look forward to seeing you in the next one [Music] you



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  1. I first saw this video long before the allegations against Dobrik came out, but even then, the fact that there are barely any comments about that situation on this video, and the fact that this video REALLY DOESN'T LOOK GOOD NOW, kinda baffles me!!

    I feel that Charisma on Command should do what they did for Ellen Degeneres. They first made a video that looked positively at Ellen and her jokes, but then more recently, about 10 months ago, they did the exact opposite kind of video about Ellen.
    In other words, if they were to do another video about David, which even then feels pretty doubtful, they should make one that talks about what NOT to do!!

  2. So the video title is "How To Be Popular Without Being A Try Hard" and then in the picture preview, you have a guy pointing to his face saying "smile like this!". How does that work? How are you not being a try hard if you're controlling something that should come across as genuine and natural. Do you see babies controlling the way they smile? It's completely unnecessary and fake.

  3. I feel like one key (to me) to making your laughter make others feel good is to not just laugh at everything. If they respect your opinion and know that you won’t just laugh whenever ANYTHING happens then I’d be more likely to feel good when you laugh

  4. Hi there .
    A Really nice video and all of tham are great.
    I have a question that drove me to this video here. And it got patially answered but maybe I just want to hear specifically thoughts about the topic.
    It is about the topic of false smiling and played motivation.
    I personally started to see a habit of myself i dont really like.
    it is that I was confronted with false smiles and false passion in some professiones that I cant differ anymore between played passion and real passion.
    An example (not to attack anyone I want to better mayself) I have met so many personal tainers and fittnesscoaches who try hard to be happy etc that I cant take any positive emoutiones anymore from trainers because I allways think they are fake……
    So is there a video from you how you can see if a smile is fake or not or does anyone have a good method taining yourself in getting better in diffenecing those things?
    I dont want to have prejudices against any profession so I have to learn to differencieate.
    What are the sighns of false smile false passion.
    If i asked a alllready answered question I am happy to get sources ^^

  5. I'm an introvert and to be honest I find it SUPER annoying if people laugh every 10 seconds.. My flatmate is an extrovert, liked by everyone, and she does the same. Even about things that aren't even funny. That has nothing to do with jealousy but for me this is super irritating 😐

  6. 1:49 – what exactly is allowing yourself to laugh? If I'm not laughing it's not cuz I'm holding back it's because I would be embarrassed to make a laughing sound to mimic being actually amused. And I'm not some hoity- toity person with a sophisticated sense of humor, it's just that my sense of humor is so obscure that I rarely find anyone else who shares it.